I did another doodle, under freestyle. I also want…
I did another doodle, under freestyle.
I also want to say in response to the negative feedback I received the other day from my outburst…
I have been running this site, now, for 4 years or so (including the days before the domain name). I’ve had Soundtrack Week, Soundtrack Week 2, and countless other times where participating was encouraged by me, by either commenting on something, emailing me, playing in a contest, or whatever the case was. And every single time I ask for participation or feedback, I get next to nothing. It’s hard for me to comprehend the normal human being’s mind and truly understand why this is. When I am asked to participate in such a way, I immediately do so.
Do you know how it feels to be constantly rejected by your “friends”, peers, and the rest of the world who pass by this site… time and time again? I realize this site is not important to any of you. But you seem to forget that this site is, in a sense, me. Wholly. So when you reject the site, you are rejecting me. If I came up to you and showed you a piece of work I just did and was so proud of it, and I wanted to show it to you and see what you thought… would you turn your head and walk away? That’s what you’re doing by not commenting when I ask your opinion (which I RARELY ever do). Now, put together that feeling and learn that you’ve had 40-50 people pass through the site, essentially multiplying that feeling by 40-50 times… and one comment.
And you all wonder why I’m angry. And you all wonder why I can justify my death. And you all wonder why I’m depressed and tell me I can change it.
HOW!? How can I change it?!
By creating something positive? ==ok, done==
By showing my positive creation to the world? ==ok, done==
Hmm… no one cares. No one’s paying any attention. Fuck that. You may say I’m self-centered by writing all of this and being pissy because I’m not getting any attention and *whine whine whine* but you know what? It’s not ME who’s being selfish. I am not the one who’s looking at the homeless man with 2 cents in my pocket, neglecting to pass it along to him. I’m not going around snubbing my nose up at the people who just want your minute long input.
