Don’t worry, this’ll all be interesting when I’m dead.

had only heard a week or so ago that the long-awaited 3rd album, “Extraordinary Machine”, was being re-done with a different producer. Well, apparently it’s all done and Team Fiona is already launching all the new websites, artwork, promotions, etc.

www.fiona-apple.com

For all you who thought it would never happen, there it is.

While I’m here, I might as well try to think of something purposeful…
Hmm, I weigh more than I ever have in my life thus far. I can’t exactly determine how that happened, but I think it’s due to sitting in this chair all day with no job and no school.

I have taken on a project of designing a corporate website for a company out of Allentown. More news on that once I am hired (hired = they like a design and tell me to build it) — But that on top of a large project consisting of 200+ photo restorations… which 140 or so got wiped out with the hard drive… I have reason to sit here all day, at least. Yes. I was more than half way done the project when I lost everything I had been working on. I’m still waiting to hear if I can recover the data. If my friend at The Geek Squad can’t do it, I have a program that just might be able to get it off the drive. But I haven’t heard from him in a week and a half.

Saw my old friends, Shanon and Jaclyn a couple times recently. I knew them from hosting the karaoke shows when I first started going back in January ‘04. It’s Shanon’s company that is giving me a try on their website.

You might think- No. I might think my mind is blank as I have no deep thought or revelation to convey today or anytime recently. I’m scared about that. Have I reached a plateau? That right there is one of the first questions I’ve asked myself in ages. We should always be questioning ourselves. I see I’m not growing. So, yes… I have reached a plateau. But I won’t be here long. Just wading around in the dead pool, so to speak. Not much I can do at the moment. Need some structure. Need some routine. Need to be needed. Need to have cause. Need a cause. Missing the tangible poetry that used to be so blatently in my face, full of misery and beauty. I loved it. I loved it all.

Yeah, my questions sometimes get answered before I have time to think of the question.

I really should just sit down and write more. We all should. And never stop questioning yourself or you’ll never get anywhere. Trust me on this one.

eriously, I need your email addresses. I have but only a few – and don’t assume I have yours (unless you just mailed me since my last entry).

8/18/05 Update: I got my sound working.

or a measly $100 I purchased a new hard drive and have it set as my master. Trying to access anything on my former master and it’s just not even seeing it. I have my computer working fine but I have lost everything. You might look at it and smirk at its infantile demeaner, like you would a child upon his accidental dropping of an ice cream cone. You might even think it serves me right and teach me how attached I am to my computer. But I work differently than you. I don’t keep a filing cabinet in the corner of the room with papers and writings and photographs. I live in a different age. I have lost, in your terms:
All my photographs
All my saved mail (this includes important information, receipts, proclamations of love, passwords, system information, website setup info, etc etc)
All my music
All my poetry, rants, stories
All saved poetry, writings, stories, etc from other people
All my website bookmarks
All the email/phone/address info for everyone I know
All future appointments
All previous appointments I wanted to keep to remember when things happened

And there’s more, I just can’t even think about it now. It’s all sitting in a little metal box and I’ve got to find a way to get it out of there.

Now, my sound card hasn’t worked since the exchange. I don’t understand why. I didn’t take anything out of it. I don’t even know what sound card is in there since it came with it. I probably just need to install the driver for it but how do I find out what’s in there if the computer tells me I don’t have one attached?! I need some help. Hopefully I’ll get it soon.

It’s late. I gotta go to bed. Such a disappointing and depressing day…
You might compare it to your apartment/house burning down with all your paperwork and possessions with it. I’m recovering from a smoke-less fire. It’s not easy.

Do me a favor and send me an email so I have your email addresses. I’d appreciate it greatly.

unday evening’s storms messed up my computer. I have finally been able to get in the back door through my old hard drive with Win2k installed on it. I can’t even access my NERO software to copy all my files onto CD. This is so bad, I think I’ve lost all my personal files. I just don’t know what to do. I can’t even tell what is wrong. As far as I can tell, my primary drive is not being recognized. On it, I have all my website files, my stories, my writings, my emails, all your email addresses, … everything.

I am hoping I can get it all back somehow but I have a feeling it’s all lost. This is quite devestating. I can’t get anyones emails so don’t think I’m ignoring you. Hopefully you’ll see a new update here within the next few days. Hopefully I’ll have good news.

fter nearly 4 years, my “portfolio site” has received a complete overhaul. It’s now geared more as a gallery of portfolios rather than a portfolio/sales site. The training I received was not just “how to design” so I wanted to show “how I designed” by using new skills I’ve acquired. For instance… for the first time ever, I used Flash animation. I just stuck in an animation at the top of my galleries. It’s not flaunting the Flash skills, but a potential employer will be looking at Logos I’ve made and also know that I can use Flash, too. Know what I mean? mm hmm. So take a look and leave me some feedback here.

[ the carpeted wall ]

I have root beer in my hand but I wish I grabbed the grape soda instead. I don’t know why.

Dan has been taking a car load of crap from his house to here every day this week. It’s filled up the livingroom and once its all in there, his room(s) will be completed and the crap will be moved accordingly.

I love walking around barefoot now.

Last words, so innocent. So real. A simple goodbye at the end of a fairytale. Will it hold? Time will tell. They’re only articulated modulations. It takes a lot more than words to truly say goodbye. I’m not really sure what I mean. Just thinking outloud.