Don’t worry, this’ll all be interesting when I’m dead.

Thought I’d update on my dad:

He’s still in the rehab center. All these other issues keep coming up preventing him from getting home. His latest issue is shingles. They don’t want to let him go home because he can’t dress it if it’s on his back, so they’re waiting until it’s under control. Now we’re hoping for the end of this week. Visitors are welcome.

I’ll be heading over there in a little bit to watch the last quarter of the Eagles game with him.

In other news… I sit here, utterly privileged to know one of the most eloquent and inspiring women this world has to offer. Someone who has that heavenly gift of imperfect perfection. You’re jealous, aren’t you?

“When you woke this morning and opened up your eyes, did you notice the tear stains lining your face were mine?”

–Queensryche

Letters forming words filling voids within my heart

just when I thought it was empty.

Crazy what they could have been, if I heard them,

if I felt them.

Ready for this?

My mom has gone missing. It’s been over 12 hours at this point… yes, I said MISSING. But I must get some sleep.

2004 better bring me a fucking shitload of karma. This is all too much to believe… and YOU don’t even know the half of it yet. Oh yes… there’s been more. But it’s still not time yet.

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Experience a faster, new, and recently updated Carpeted Wall. Now.

My dad is in a rehab for a few days before he’s sent home again. I may or may not be moving in with him in the near future… to look after him.

I’ve been happy.

Tonight, I’ve been happier.

“There was a time that the pieces fit, but I watched you fall away.

Mildewed and smoldering, strangled by our coveting.

I’ve done the math enough to know the dangers of our second guessings.

Doomed to crumble unless we grow and strengthen our communication.

Cold silence has a tendency to atrophy

any sense of compassion between supposed lovers.”

–Tool: Schism

Please, please… the influx on comments made about my father’s miraculous event is too much!

He’s pretty weak but he’s talking and eating, sitting up, and looking good. He can breathe! I expect another week or so of recovery before he’s able to go home.

I got my first speeding ticket last night. They used the Vascar system in an area that drops from 45mph to 25mph and back to 45mph in the course of about a 1/4 mile. So… they were just toally out to make their quota. One other guy was being ticketed at the same time as me and I saw 4 or 5 other cop cars in the time I was pulled over. Makes me sick that they must prey on us like this when they’re hungry. I have driven down this stretch of road at least 400 times in my life and never noticed the speed reduction, therefore never reduced my speed. I passed cops through that stretch of road at least 40 times and never was my “mistake” brought to my attention. I’m currently researching all I can to see if I have any case. I really don’t quite have the money to pay this $104.00 ticket. (However, he was being “nice” and he did not hit me with a moving violation so there are no points taken off — even though I was timed at 20 miles over the limit)

He had the surgery today and he made it through without any complications!

He is currently stable and they will be slowly taking him off machines and medications over the next few days.

No aneurysm was found, by the way, but his mitral valve had to be completely replaced.

His chances were just so slim, I can’t believe he made it through. I’ll have some more info. tomorrow.

Dad was taken into the ICU (Intensive Care Unit) early this morning, again. Family was called. He was on all sorts of machines, they were asking about any living will, asking what I want to do if his heart stops, and all kinda of wonderful things.

I leave work at noon.

From 1pm until 6pm I stayed there, next to his medicinally sedated body while the machines forced him to breathe, forced his heart to pump blood, injected fluids, and drained fluids. My uncle was also there but there was little communication.

I may have spoken too soon when I had accepted the fact that he wouldn’t be coming out again. The medicine was doing little for him and there was still no reasoning for WHY this is all happening. We made the decision that if his heart stops beating, to basically do nothing more than procedure.

You see, I may have spoken too soon because at around 6pm a cardiologist who had just taken an echocardiogram noticed a few things he was “shocked” to see. An aneurysm in the ventricle and a leaky valve in his heart. I’ll spare you the details but basically this explains everything. These things can be corrected with surgery… Except he’s in no shape for it right now.

His condition is improving. If it continues to do so, he may be in a well enough state for surgery in a few days. There’s no telling if he’ll be able to hang on for that long. Obviously, the surgery is especially risky in his condition, however, seeing as it’s really the only option to save him, we’re willing to risk it.

I’m quite tired… I will keep this updated as much as I can. Thanks.

Well, Dad is not feeling well again. He can’t breathe… and they can’t figure out why. In all honesty, he’s even scared.

Job is going great. I’m very excited to be there. It’s exactly what I’ve been looking for.

I saw The Matrix III last night. So many things could be taken from it. What did YOU take away from it?

So what do you think of this new design?

I’m thinking at least Joel will be pleased…