I found myself going through the archives tonight. June through September 2001, to be exact. It's funny to me, because I find it entertaining. There's some pretty good writing in there. I wish I was still like that. I wish I could write about anything I was feeling, like I used to. It's so hard now. I don't think I got bored with the idea, but rather... I got diluted. With my mom becoming a daily viewer, I really had to start cencoring myself even more that I already was. I'm trying to get back out of that... now that she's no longer online. I have changed. Whether it's visible or not, I am constantly evolving and adapting. Many times, not for the better.

I haven't heard back from TV Guide and I did everything I could to follow up. I am VERY excited about another potential position which I am NOT going to jinx this time talking about it. So far, this sounds the most promising and the most fun job.

I had to take my dad to the hospital tonight. I haven't had to for quite a while. He's suffering from chest pains, shortness of breath, and dizziness. With his heart condition, anything like that could be dangerous. 'Course I've been having similar problems recently, too... and because I have the same heart condition, I should be concerned. I'm not. I know it'll pass.