I am alive. Pulsating mind, ashtray lipped, and all. "Ah, but a cliché wouldn't be a cliché if it didn't hold truth."
The time has come, again, for the gates to open. For the time that ----------------------------------------------------- I find it slightly amusing that now, after barely blogging daily, I I'd write more but I'm sick with a cold and need to get home and to Frieghtening indeed... but impossible. Get used to it. PICKUP LINES O' THE DAY:
It's 2:33am and all's well. Except for the fact that I promised I'd try to cut down smoking. Boy, the things one will do for love! A customer I had the other day works for some start-up company and I asked if they needed any web designers and she warned that the company is probably gonna fail soon, but a lot of their clients might be seeking one out. I handed my email/website to her and she said she'll let me know. I still have yet to hear from IBX (Independance Blue Cross) I think it's time to go searching again. It's obviously not gonna happen. God damn that pisses me off. That woman should die... or at least be fired. Until next time....
I'm on the verge of forclosure.
Things with Johanna are going smoothly at the moment. It's strange because things will be great one minute and then seem to be on the verge of forclosure. I'm about to find my way to Deptford Mall to where she is training for her managerial position at Granite Run. Today I am so stressed out. Too many stupid people in this world. Far too many to even care about anymore, but that just pisses me off even more that it's gotten to this point. I'm so low on money, too. And it doesn't look like I will be able to catch up unless I get a different job... and I am desperate but I have to be picky about the pay. God.... why is this world so fucked up? Fucked up beyond repair. "I'm praying for rain. I'm praying for tidal waves. I wanna see the ground give way. I wanna watch it all go down. Ma, please flush it all away. I wanna see it go right in, down. I wanna watch it go right in... and watch you flush it all away...." ~TOOL "Aenima"
Her name is Johanna. Already, it's been quite a ride. She's taken me to a few bars in Olde City, Dave & Buster's... she's shown me Taxi Driver, 102 Dalmatians, and La Femme Nikita. Right now, she's in the city getting pierced. I'm just too exhausted to go join her. But hopefully, she's not pissed off at me enough to diss me tonight.
Things recently learned: 1. Don't mix alcohols I apologize for the lack of blogs. I have my reasons and they're my own fault anyway. (Not to mention that whenever I do try to blog, I have no site to put it on!) And since that's about all that's going on, I am done today's entry. Hope all is well with whoever is reading this.
Look for me, thanks.
"She came like March.
In like a lion, out like a lamb.
In like a lion, out like a lamb.
She came like March, while I lay there,
deafened by her yelp"
Women are indeed the devil's creation, yet no one is human if they aren't tempted by it's lure.
I'd like to get off of the edge of my chair, I'm still waiting to exhale. What will become of this tangled web we weave? I'd like to know, but patience is a virtue...
...and other clichés.
"which is yet another cliché in itself."
::Coz::
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4.24.2001
(MIDI not currently available)
::Coz::
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My heart has self-installed it's own security system. It's gates
lock and seal tight so as to not let anything in as well as anything
out. That is, until it feels it's safe.
has come has been deemed "safe." That magical 4-letter word has
entered the picture, and I'm not talking about T-A-D-A.
I had a lot more written and it was much better written earlier at my
house. (I'm at Johanna's) Then my browser crashed and I considered re-writing it, but
then I couldn't get the computer to recognise the mouse, even after
resetting it 4 times. Can you feel my pain?
have a constant 5 daily visitors now.
bed.
No matter how pathetic things get to be, there's always something
better ahead. Even though it is a frieghtening thought that I share
with "Johnny" from that wonderful, wonderful film "Naked":
"Have you ever thought, right, that you've already experienced the
best moment of your life and all you have to look forward to is
sickness and purgatory?"
1. "Hi. I'm Mr. Right. Someone said you were looking for me?"
2. "My friend wants to know if you think I'm cute."
~~~~~~Lines courtesy of Joel Perlish's Daily Laughs --
www.joelperlish.com~~~~~~
::Coz::
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4.16.2001
Whew! That was a close one.
I can tell she's not one to appreciate being talked about over the internet so that's why I haven't said much about her. I'll tell you this, though.... she is one wild & crazy girl. At the same time, though, she can be the sweetest thing.
I feel a bit disconnected with this whole not-blogging-everyday thing. I just get home so late every night that I am forced to go to bed immediatly. I can't even check my mail every day. It's sad. ..........or is it?
::Coz::
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4.15.2001
As if there wasn't enough trouble in my life...
::Coz::
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4.13.2001
As little the amount of people read this, I feel guilty for blogging so irregularly. Mainly, I think it's because this really is for my own self... my own little therapy.
::Coz::
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4.8.2001
It has been quite a week. I'm extremely sorry for not keeping up with the blog. I know you all care so much. I've been out all night just about every night this week... having a good time. Experiencing new things... gaining a little bit of a life! Who is this miracle worker, you ask?
The bars were extraordinary! Something you'd see in a movie. In one bar, you go down these stairs past a dude checking ID's. Along the wall of the staircase in big, cockeyed letters reads "Playland" and it's all lit up with small round lightbulbs tracing the inside of each letter. Once down in the basement, there is "bar" in those same letters. The main bar wraps around two walls and the rest of the area is just dark, dirty concrete with huge brick columns every 20 feet. Imagine a basement, not furnished... with a bar installed with dim lighting. Strange paper mache faces the size of doorways snarling at you at every turn. Sugarmom's was the name of the place. Then she took me to soMa. This place was about the size of your average hole-in-the-wall bar. It was dim with a coffeeshop atmosphere to it, but it was a bar. A tall, skinny college student (most likely an art student) was bartending. He was talking to a few other obvious art students. There was a Dj there constantly spinning tunes. There were a few girls there looking like they're straight out of a rave, and then a few black guys come in. They mingle. People slowly grooving to the sounds in the middle of the room by themselves, while the others against the red velvet wavy walls sat and drank. A few more people came in, obviously not art students. Obviously inner-city kids. No one flinched. Everyone was cool. Everyone was everyone, and there were no differences present.
Dave & Buster's is just amazing. There's one in almost every major city. GO CHECK IT OUT if you haven't already. It's like an indoor amusement park for adults. Huge arcade, unbelievable food and drinks, a virtual theater-ride, and pool tables out the Yuengling.
Speaking of Yuengling, soMa has $2 Yuengling's for most days of the week.
::Coz::
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4.5.2001
Woah. Someone attending Harvard, or at least using their computer, searched Google (best search engine) for "Coz Baldwin" -- that's neat. Who art thou? Write me!
::Coz::
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4.4.2001
(Supposed to have been published Wednesday night. No host, though.)
2. Don't go to grocery store with your grandmother
3. Don't volunteer barely 18 ex-girlfriends to model for your boss.
4. Don't kiss and tell and proceed to tell the kissee that you told.
I met someone. Hung out a couple times. We get along quite well. This, I am happy about... and it's showing.
Maybe more about her later.
::Coz::
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4.2.2001
I can now be found on Yahoo! Messenger under the name "coz_baldwin"
::Coz::
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La La...
April Fools....
::Coz::
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